Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsDefinitionExamplesCharacteristicsSymptomsBenefitsStagesCoping
Table of ContentsView All
View All
Table of Contents
Definition
Examples
Characteristics
Symptoms
Benefits
Stages
Coping
Anticipatory grief is a state of deep, painful sorrow that occurs before an impending loss. It can affect people facing the impending death of a loved one or their own death.
The term can also be applied to a loss not associated with death, such as the anticipation of losing a breast during amastectomy, of facing an impending divorce, or of being diagnosed with a progressive condition likeAlzheimer’s disease.
This article explains what anticipatory grief is, what it can look and feel like, and how to cope as you come to terms with the loss of someone or something important in your life.
Oliver Rossi / The Image Bank / Getty Images
This article is directed more toward someone who is grieving the impending loss of a loved one rather than someone facing death who may be navigating thefive stages of grief,
What Is Anticipatory Grief?
Anticipatory grief is defined as grief that occurs before a loss. The term is often used in the context of death but can encompass the impending loss of things not related to death. Anticipatory grief is common both among caregivers and those being cared for, often occurring simultaneously.
Anticipatory grief is more than just normal grieving that starts early.It is often regarded as a means to process and resolve issues related to a dying person or a life-changing event. It may provide you with a means to proactively address your feelings and the likely consequences of the loss, dealing with them now rather than after the fact.
Younger people tend to experience anticipatory grief more often and more traumatically, in part because they will have experienced loss less often than an older person and may have a more conceptual view of death.
A 2017 study in theJournal of Hospice and Palliative Nursingreported that among adults withterminal cancer, those under 25 tended to view death as an “extinction.” As a result, they experienced anticipatory grief more often and more severely than adults 25 and older.
What Are Examples of Anticipatory Grief?
The implications of these events can be multi-faceted.
They may involve concerns about finances and whether you’re going to be able to support yourself and your family afterward. They may involve feelings of guilt, such as not wanting to continue a pregnancy due to a birth defect or not wanting to watch a loved one deteriorate. Or, you may start to fear how others will perceive you or if they will abandon you after the loss.
Anticipatory Grief vs. Grief After Death: What Are the Differences?
Anticipatory grief is similar to “conventional” grief after death insofar as they involve many of the same emotions.
But with conventional grief, the emotions you experience are the direct consequence of a loss. Anticipatory grief is the grief that you expect to experience, much of which is conceptual and can change over time.
Anticipatory grief is sometimes described as a “rollercoaster” because you can shift back and forth between feelings of distress for several days and feelings of normalcy for several days.There may also be a part of you clinging to the hope that the diagnosis is wrong, buoying you at one moment and triggering intense anxiety at another.
With conventional grief, your emotions and actions are reactive. With anticipatory grief, your emotions and actions are largely proactive.
A study of Swedish females who had lost a spouse determined that 40% found the pre-loss stage more stressful than the post-loss stage.
What Are the Symptoms of Anticipatory Grief?
The emotions associated with anticipatory grief are similar to those that occur after a loss. They can fluctuate unexpectedly and include:
What Are the Benefits of Anticipatory Grief?
For some, it may help them sort out their feelings and make preparations for moving forward. Many bereavement experts contend that anticipatory grief allows a person to:
By doing so, a person may have less distress and be better able to navigate bereavement when the loved one dies.
For others, however, anticipatory grief may only serve as a prelude to conventional grief, neither bolstering the person for the harsh reality of their loss nor preparing them for life ahead.
Other studies suggested that anticipatory grief—especially in situations where there is deep, unrelenting sadness—was in risk factor for prolonged grief disorder, a psychiatric condition in which a person has a persistent longing for a lost loved one.
According to the American Psychiatric Association, between 7% and 10% of bereaved adults meet the criteria for PGD with symptoms persisting for six months or more, including:
In some cases, the grief can be so intense that it interferes with your ability tocope. It is also common for people to developdepressionin the midst of profound loss. It can be hard to tell grief and depression apart.
Seek help from a mental health professional if you are having a hard time coping. A therapist can help you decide if you’re dealing with"normal" grief or “complicated” grief.
What Are the Stages of Anticipatory Grief?
Facets of the traditional five stages of grief—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—can occur with anticipatory grief and move back and forth in the same way as well.
However, the stages of anticipatory grief differ if you are the caregiver. In this context, the stages are considered to involve:
How to Cope With Anticipatory Grief
It’s important to let yourself grieve. Find a friend or another loved to help you:
Some people may wonder why you are grieving before the death has happened. Some may even become angry about it.
Keep in mind that letting go doesn’t mean you have to stop loving the person you’re losing. During this stage, you can begin to find a safe place in your heart to hold memories that will never die.
A Word From Verywell
—ELLE MARKMAN, PSYD, MEDICAL EXPERT BOARD
Summary
If you arefacing the end of your lifeor the death of someone close, grief may come before death does. Anticipatory grief refers to the sorrow and other feelings you experience as you await an impending loss. It has some benefits: It may help you find closure, settle differences, or prepare yourself for the pain of letting go.
This kind of grief can come with lots of other emotions, including anxiety, guilt, fear, and irritability. You may lose sleep, have problems concentrating, making decisions, or remembering things. All of these symptoms are normal.
It’s also perfectly normal not to have anticipatory grief. It’s a good idea to reach out for emotional and practical support if grief is keeping you from functioning day to day.
Coping With Anticipatory Grief
7 Sources
Verywell Health uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.
Rogalla KB.Anticipatory grief, proactive coping, social support, and growth: exploring positive experiences of preparing for loss.Omega (Westport). 2020 May;81(1):107-29. doi:10.1177/0030222818761461
Zordan RD, Bell ML, Price M, Remedios C, Lobb E, Hall C, Hudson P.Long-term prevalence and predictors of prolonged grief disorder amongst bereaved cancer caregivers: a cohort study.Palliat Support Care. 2019 Oct;17(5):507-14. doi:10.1017/S1478951518001013
Coelho A, de Brito M, Barbosa A.Caregiver anticipatory grief: phenomenology, assessment and clinical interventions.Curr Opin Support Palliat Care.2018;12(1):52-57. doi: 10.1097/SPC.0000000000000321.
Johnson J, Lodhi MK, Cheema U.Outcomes for end-of-life patients with anticipatory grieving: insights from practice with standardized nursing terminologies within an interoperable internet-based electronic health record.J Hosp Palliat Nurs.2017 Jun;19(3):223–31. doi:10.1097/NJH.0000000000000333
National Cancer Institute.Types of grief reactions.
American Psychiatric Association.Prolonged grief disorder (PGD).
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