Table of ContentsView AllTable of ContentsDefinitionTypesSymptomsRisk FactorsTriggersTreatmentCoping
Table of ContentsView All
View All
Table of Contents
Definition
Types
Symptoms
Risk Factors
Triggers
Treatment
Coping
Relationship OCD (ROCD) is a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder that involves obsessions, preoccupations, doubts, and compulsive behaviors related to a relationship with another person.
ROCD is not currently an official diagnosis in the fifth edition of the American Psychiatric Association’sDiagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders(DSM-5). However, these types of relationship symptoms have been frequently discussed in OCD forums for several years. These symptoms have recently begun to receive more formal research attention.
This article focuses on ROCD in romantic relationships, exploring the risk factors, symptoms, and ways of managing ROCD.
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What Is Relationship OCD?
Having some degree of worry or doubt in a relationship is typical. Still, for people with relationship OCD, these preoccupations significantly disrupt the relationship and the person’s ability to function as an individual. They constantly analyze themselves, their partner, or their relationship, obsessing over even minor perceived flaws.
While a lot of research focuses on ROCD in romantic relationships, it can occur in any relationship, including friendships, siblinghood, and parent-child relationships.
Types of Relationship OCD
ROCD can manifest in two ways: as relationship-centered or partner-focused ROCD.Both presentations of ROCD often cause extreme and debilitating distress for the individual and their relationship. It can also affect psychological well-being. ROCD obsessions and compulsions can take up a lot of time and energy, interfering with functioning in other areas of life.
Relationship-Centered ROCD
Features of relationship-centered ROCD are as follows.
Partner-Focused ROCD
In partner-focused ROCD, the person may experience the following.
Is ROCD Always One Type or Another?
Both presentations of ROCD can occur together.Often, a person with ROCD begins with a preoccupation with a perceived flaw in their partner (partner-focused), which then leads to obsessive thoughts about the “rightness” of the relationship (relationship-centered).
Symptoms of Relationship OCD
As with other forms of OCD, ROCD involves obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors. It’s important to distinguish between typical relationship worries and doubts and ones indicative of ROCD. Almost everyone experiences some of these thoughts at times, such as not always being in the mood for sexual intimacy or wondering if your relationship is right for you.
However, if these feelings or thoughts begin to interfere with your relationship or mental health, visiting a healthcare professional is a good idea.
Obsessive Thoughts
Obsessive symptoms in ROCD can include:
People with ROCD may perceive innocuous thoughts and behaviors as “signs” that they don’t really love their partner or that their relationship isn’t viable. These can include:
Compulsive Behaviors
Compulsive behaviors common in ROCD include:
Compulsive behaviors may provide temporary relief from obsessive thoughts, but the obsessions always return.
What’s the Difference Between ROCD and Normal Doubts?It is a normal human experience to have doubts about romantic relationships. If you are having unexpected or unwanted preoccupations with your relationship, such as intrusive thoughts that your partner has a particular flaw or urges to leave your partner for no known reason, speak to a mental health provider.They can help you determine if your feelings might be part of ROCD.
What’s the Difference Between ROCD and Normal Doubts?
It is a normal human experience to have doubts about romantic relationships. If you are having unexpected or unwanted preoccupations with your relationship, such as intrusive thoughts that your partner has a particular flaw or urges to leave your partner for no known reason, speak to a mental health provider.They can help you determine if your feelings might be part of ROCD.
Risk Factors for ROCD
The exact causes of ROCD are not known. However, researchers have identified some risk factors:
Triggers of Relationship OCD
There are certain things that can trigger ROCD in those who have risk factors.
Age
The age of onset of ROCD is not known. Still, clinical evidence has shown symptoms often begin to present in early adulthood or when a person is first faced with commitment-related romantic decisions.
Previous ROCD symptoms
ROCD symptoms often persist from one relationship to another and can occur when a person is not actively in a relationship (such as having obsessions about past or future relationships).
Belief Systems
Certain beliefs and thought processes common to other forms of OCD may be linked to ROCD as well, such as:
ROCD symptoms do not seem to be significantly related to relationship length or gender.
ROCD istypically treatedwith therapy, but medication may be used in some cases.
Therapy
While involving a person’s partner in the therapeutic process can be beneficial, the goal of therapy for ROCD is not to “save” the relationship but rather to address the ROCD symptoms.
Relationship OCD is typically treated withcognitive behavioral therapy(CBT). CBT involves learning to recognize problematic thinking and behaviors, then, over time, replacing them with healthier, more productive ones.
Exposure response prevention therapy(ERP) is a type of CBT commonly used to treat OCD, including ROCD. ERP involves repeated, gradually intense exposure to the source of fear (such as obsessive thoughts) while resisting the urge to perform compensatory or neutralizing behaviors (compulsions). With repeated exposure to the trigger, the brain learns to recognize it as irrational, often reducing the obsessions and, in turn, lessening the urge to engage in compulsions.
Medication
Medication is not a first-line treatment for OCD, butselective serotonin reuptake inhibitors(SSRIs) may be used alongside therapy to help manage symptoms. Dosages of SSRIs tend to be higher when used to treat OCD than in other conditions, such asdepression.
SSRIs that may be used to treat OCD include:
Similarities and Differences Between Zoloft and Prozac
ROCD is not afear of intimacyor commitment but rather a specific and intense fear of being in the wrong relationship.
ROCD can put strain on a relationship and both people in it. A relationship can survive ROCD, but ROCD symptoms should be addressed regardless of their effects on the relationship or its outcome. Treatment for ROCD can help a person see their relationship more clearly and make better decisions, including if they want to stay in it.
Summary
ROCD is a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder in which a person experiences obsessions and compulsions related to their relationships. It can involve symptoms such as constantly questioning if they really want to be with their partner, being hyper-focused on perceived flaws they see in their partner, and seeking reassurance or proof that their relationship is “right.” ROCD can cause distress to the individual experiencing it and strain their relationship.
ROCD is typically treated with therapy, particularly CBT or ERP, but medication may be prescribed if necessary to help with symptom relief.
6 Sources
Verywell Health uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read oureditorial processto learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.
Gorelik M, Szepsenwol O, Doron G.Promoting couples’ resilience to relationship obsessive compulsive disorder (Rocd) symptoms using a CBT-based mobile application: A randomized controlled trial.Heliyon. 2023;9(11):e21673. doi:10.1016/j.heliyon.2023.e21673
Melli G, Bulli F, Doron G, Carraresi C.Maladaptive beliefs in relationship obsessive compulsive disorder (ROCD): Replication and extension in a clinical sample.Journal of Obsessive-Compulsive and Related Disorders. 2018;18:47-53. doi:10.1016/j.jocrd.2018.06.005
International OCD Foundation.Relationship OCD.
OCD Center of Los Angeles.ROCD: relationship OCD and the myth of “the one”.
National Institute of Mental Health. National Institutes of Health.Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
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